Ding dong, The taxes are done!

I wish I had something more interesting to report but I’ve spent the last weekend holed up in our office doing the taxes. Yes, I procrastinated a bit this year. I actually used to sort of enjoy doing the taxes. We have some complicating factors which I found great satisfaction in figuring out all the little ins and outs and crazy little irs rules. Now, it’s just time spent away from my little girl and husband.

Kaia’s Grandma and Grandpa came to town for the weekend to help Paul out while I was holed up in said office and it’s always so great to have them around. The best part is how much Grandma absolutely adores Kaia and all the nitty gritty details of taking care of her – changing her diapers and even the messy, frustrating business of feeding her.

Bonus of having Grandma and Grandpa here: Paul and I got to go on a couple dates. I surprised him Friday night with a couples massage. He had never had a professional massage. It had been years since I had. We were both all giggly and excited to do something so different. I felt a little extravagant about spending so much money on a hour’s worth of luxury. I felt much better about it after finishing the taxes and discovering that uncle sam decided to reward us this year with a nice little refund.

Let’s see, what else? Kaia had her augmentative communication evaluation Monday. She didn’t want to “perform” but the therapist still recommended, based on the reports of myself and her speech therapist who also attended the evaluation, a low-tech device like the go talk 4+, the cheap talk 4 or 8, the 7 level communication builder, or even the super talker. We now have access to the lending library where she’ll get to borrow any of those devices and test drive them for a month at a time.

We’re also going to be bumping speech therapy up to twice weekly so she’ll have an extra hour of therapy each week (up to 7 therapy sessions a week now). I, of course, have mixed feelings about this. I want her to have the most opportunities for success and yet still give us time to have a life outside therapy. I just can’t rightly keep that hour of therapy from her. Not when we only have just over a year in early intervention left.

Free nursing cover (only pay $7.95 shipping)

My bargain hunting friend forwarded me this deal borrowed from Babycheapskate:

http://www.uddercovers.com/shop1.php

Use code onefree to snag a free pink or blue nursing cover from UdderCovers. Originally $32. Great shower gift! Grab one before they're gone.

I ordered the blue one because I'm still nursing Kaia and I've been wanting to try a cover with the built-in rigid neckline. I just got it in the mail the other day and while it was worth the cost of shipping, I wouldn't have paid much more than that for it. I still think it's a great deal worth passing on, though. There are only pink and blue ones remaining, and the blue ones are on backorder and won't be shipped until after May 1st. Get yours while you can!

Ride on, my girl

Last week Kaia’s PT suggested we look into getting Kaia a ride on toy. Kaia had one that her grandparents had purchased brand new for her last year that converted from a sit down ride on car to a push toy. She loved the push toy aspect of it but she’s so tall that it was just too low for her to use as a ride on toy.

It’s still too early for garage sales so I checked out craigslist. It’s a little pricier than garage sales in general but sometimes you can find exactly what you’re looking for without driving to a bunch of sales.

I picked up this toy on Sunday afternoon. It was in great shape, had never been used outside, and cost only 10 bucks. We put batteries in it and Kaia loved pushing all the keys and buttons. She’s really isolating her pointer finger to push now. I tried to show her how to use her legs to push but she just didn’t quite get it.



On Wednesday her PT made her weekly visit and worked with Kaia for about a half hour on the ride on toy. She helped Kaia put her legs back up on her toes and assisted her to push the toy backwards with her feet. By the end, Kaia was then pushing the toy forward if you prompted her with the backward assist. She still wouldn’t keep going though. I continued to work with her after the PT left until her nap. Right after lunch she pointed and vocalized to her toy so I assisted her on to it by helping her shift her weight to one leg and again prompted her by giving her the backwards assist. Kaia pushed forward and then kept going! It’s so cool to see her getting it, to see that connection form in her brain, to see her learn and progress. She loves this toy, and hubby had to admit it was a good buy!

Alternative therapy

Last Friday I took Kaia to an alternative type of therapy. Another mom I know that has a kid with cerebral palsy was frustrated with the progress her son was making in traditional therapy and with the lack of creativity of the therapists. She researched other types of therapies and found one called the Anat Baniel Method, based on the work of Feldenkrais. More info at: http://www.anatbanielmethod.com/help-children-overview.htm There were no practitioners of this particular type of therapy in our city. The closest was in Chicago, a three hour drive away. So, desperate to try anything that might help her son, she drove him up to Chicago to do this alternative therapy. Thankfully her insurance is covering the cost (or at least part of it) of the therapy.

Being part of a group of moms with kids with movement issues, she and the practitioner decided to gauge interest by having the practitioner come to Indianapolis for a weekend and offer a free trial session to kids here. I jumped at the chance to give Kaia the opportunity to experience this alternative therapy free here in town.

I have to admit I was skeptical. Some of the tenets of the therapy I agree with partly, in principle. For instance, they advise no orthotics. We actually waited quite a while before finally getting orthotics for Kaia. My concern was that she would never strengthen her ankles, which pronate, if they were fixed in orthotics. I finally relented to the idea that if we give her that support, she would have an opportunity to strengthen the other muscles needed for walking by being able to have the stability to try it. The Anat Baniel practitioner (she’s not a licensed OT or PT) also advised us not to assist Kaia walking by holding one of her hands. The idea as I understand it (which may be completely wrong) is not to force a child to be more upright than they are ready to be. The woman, after having me remove Kaia’s shoes and orthotics, spent most of the time touching/stimulating Kaia’s feet in a sitting position. She also touched her back. She didn’t mind Kaia being in, and didn’t force her out of, a w-sit position.

I still don’t really completely understand the theory behind it. Perhaps she didn’t do a very good job explaining it or maybe I just didn’t listen well. The other mom’s kid and Kaia have the same physical therapist. This PT was there observing for the session (The other mom had scheduled the PT to be there to watch her son’s session and the PT stayed for Kaia’s upon my request). I could tell she was trying very hard to be respectful by asking questions regarding the how/why of what the woman was doing. I didn’t think the practitioner provided an adequate explanation to her either. There definitely was some tension in the air. It pretty much is the complete opposite of everything that we’ve been told by traditional therapy to do with Kaia.

Kaia is tactilely defensive and did an admirable job putting up with all the touching. But fairly quickly she started to push the woman away and started signing “all done” and “bye bye” to her. I felt a little guilty forcing Kaia to submit to this therapy and yet I force her to do things that she doesn’t necessarily want to do all the time because it’s good for her – changing her diaper, brushing her teeth, etc. Inwardly, I was elated to see Kaia communicating her desires, even if I couldn’t fulfill her request. Thankfully the woman discovered some quirky things Kaia likes. Kaia warmed up to her so much that by the end she was trying to kiss the practitioner.

Anyway, the upshot is that if the practitioner generates enough interest, we could bring Kaia for sessions with her when she comes to town for a cost of $95 per hour. It’s actually unusual for insurance to cover it. I told her I’d check with our insurance to see if they would cover it because otherwise we really couldn’t afford it.

That same evening we brought Kaia to the monthly parents night out program. When we picked her up, Paul took her by the hand to assist her to walk down the hall. Wouldn’t you know it, she pulled her hand away and walked - on her own - the entire length of the hallway. It was at least 25 feet. The only reason she stopped was because the hall ended. We’ve had these breakthroughs before but she will usually revert to crawling almost immediately. So I didn’t hold my breath that it would remain consistent. She definitely has been on the cusp of walking for a couple months now, though.

Saturday we took her swimming in the morning and shopping in the evening. She was off and on with the walking. On Sunday, we put her therapy shorts on her. They’re called hip helpers, are bright red spandex, and she looks like a little super hero wearing them. She took off on Sunday! She walked at least 50 feet continuously and even made a 45 degree turn on her own in the middle of that stretch. She’s kept at it; alternating between doing really well or not being as motivated when she’s tired and/or hungry.

But she really can and is walking! She still falls a lot and walks with a wide base of support (the shorts do help with that), but she can do it! She can also climb up on to the couch by herself now! (That started late last week). Even after coming down with a cold Monday morning, which has thrown her balance off in the past (one of her therapists attributed that to increased fluid in the ear, which is the center of balance), she has continued to persevere in attempting to walk this week.

She also made the “help” sign to me, independently, without any prompting, today. Holy cow, was I surprised. Then she did it again a few more times. She also has said “bubbles” and “more” a couple times this week. She just loves those bubbles.

So what do you all think? Do you think she was just ready, no matter what? Do you think it was the one alternative therapy session? Do you think it was the hippotherapy (she’s gone 3 times now)? Maybe it’s the confluence of it all.

I wish I knew, but in the end I guess it doesn’t really matter. I accepted long ago that all we can do is maximize Kaia’s environment and provide opportunities for her to progress. She’s going to do it in her own time. I’m constantly amazed by her perseverance and her abilities in spite of the incredible challenges that she faces.

Her little pony

Growing up, I always wanted a pony. What little girl doesn’t? I don’t think I had an opportunity, though, to ride a horse until I was in my late teens. So it blows my mind that my little girl had her first pony ride today. And she will get to ride her pony, a little white retired show pony named Molly, every Thursday morning for the foreseeable future. These aren’t just any old pony rides, either. They are official hippotherapy sessions. A physical therapist guides Kaia on the horse around the large barn. Kaia rides facing forward and then facing backward. As kids progress, they even stand while riding on the horse. We saw a little 3 year old boy doing that during Kaia’s session today. Apparently he had started hippotherapy a year ago and couldn’t even bear weight on his legs. Within six months he was walking. There’s more info about hippotherapy in this article: http://www.nuvo.net/news/article/horses-heal The company featured in the article is the one where Kaia rides. The therapist named at the beginning is also Kaia’s therapist.

All of Kaia’s therapists have been telling us grand tales of how much progress Kaia will make when she starts hippotherapy. I don’t even care if that’s true. Don’t get me wrong, I want her to progress. I’m just excited that she is riding a horse! And I hold my expectations in check, especially after the professional who fitted her orthotics told us that kids were often walking within a couple weeks after getting them (orthotics). We just want this to be a pleasurable experience for her and I know that it is an amazing opportunity for her – in terms of sensory-input, another hour with a physical therapist, and just riding a horse, for goodness sakes!

Getting there has been a little complicated. Kaia’s been on the waiting list for occupational and physical hippotherapy since November. She was number 8 for OT and number 4 for PT. The hippotherapy stable called last week with openings for both OT and PT. We were in a bit of a dilemma over how to proceed with therapy because we were unsure how we wanted to pay for the sessions. The early intervention program through which Kaia currently receives occupational and physical therapy would cover hippotherapy by replacing either her OT or PT provider in the home. We’d also have to prove that these therapies were not working in the home. Right now she receives 2 hours of OT in the home and 1 hr of PT per week. Her OT works on feeding issues in addition to fine motor skills. The hippotherapy provider only had 1 hr of OT open and they cannot work on feeding at the barn. You’d think we could just keep 1 hour of OT in the home to work on feeding and have 1 hour at the stable for hippotherapy OT, right? Apparently that’s a big no-no. It seems it is impossible to have two providers on her plan for the same service (OT). (If you utilize early intervention in Indiana and have a different experience, please let me know.) We also really did not want to give up Kaia’s current PT in the home. In the end, we decided to do hippotherapy by paying for it with private insurance. This meant paying more out of pocket (a copay and coinsurance). That may not sound like much but over the course of a year it adds up. Our insurance is strange in that we have unlimited PT benefits – no annual limit on visits, no specific lifetime cap. However, OT benefits are unbelievably low. There is no annual limit on visits, but there is a lifetime cap of $1000. That covers maybe 10 visits. If you have a child with an ongoing need for OT, that is pitiful coverage. Kaia will receive, thankfully, services with the early intervention program until she’s 3. After that, it’s the school system, and from what I’ve been told, there really is no such thing as individual, 1 on 1 therapy there. That’s something we’ll just have to deal with in the future, though. Right now we decided to keep her two hours of OT in the home with early intervention, as well as her hour of PT, and utilize our private insurance to cover hippotherapy as PT. We’re still hoping that we may be able to appeal the ridiculous rule I mentioned regarding 2 providers with early intervention but I’m glad that we have such good PT coverage with our insurance and that she could get started right away. That’s the most important thing.

Here’s a couple shots of Kaia’s first pony ride. You can see that I was the sidewalker. Normally they don't allow parents to do that. Since it was Kaia's first time they made an exception.

Riding backwards:

Still smiling at the end!

Vacations on the cheap

Living in Indiana is made bearable by the number of vacations that we take. We probably traveled a little less last year than we did before having Kaia, and we still traveled quite a bit. Last year we all flew to Kauai in January, Paul to Minnesota and myself and Kaia to New Hampshire in February, to the Bahamas in May, to Minnesota, North Dakota, and Marco Island, Fl in June, to South Carolina and myself to Boston in July, to Big Sky, Mt in August, to North Dakota a few times in August and September, to Mazatlan, Mexico for Thanksgiving in November, and myself to New Hampshire in December.

But, I think people would be surprised to find out how little we actually spend on vacations. First of all, all that air travel cost us less than $600 total. It cost so little because of my husband’s awesome job. He works for an airline and thus gets free or incredibly reduced travel benefits. There is a catch, though. We fly standby and have learned to be very savvy about how we fly. There are the “non-rev rules” for increased likelihood of boarding an aircraft. You must attempt the first flight of the day. Check loads. Check again. Then check again. Always have a backup plan. Don’t dismiss travel on or over holidays.

Before last year, we traveled quite frequently but usually stayed in, um, how shall I say, a more modest type establishment. Well, let’s be honest, we stayed in dumps. They were cheap. We never really cared b/c we got to go to amazing places and see incredible sights. We stayed in a convent in Rome and a dormitory turned hotel in the summer in Montreal when we had Lasik surgery there. There is so much character in places like that.

During our travels we sometimes had the opportunity to stay in timeshares which generous friends gave us as gifts or for cost (the reservation booking feeand guest certificate fee) b/c otherwise they would lose it and they didn’t have funds or vacation time to use it. We attended the timeshare sales pitches but never even considered buying. It seemed like such a rip-off. Then we attended one in Hawaii. The salesman there explained a little secret in the timeshare business that would suit us perfectly. But there was no way we were going to buy there, from him. It was way too expensive.

There are certain fees associated with timeshare purchases. One is the upfront purchase price. Then there are closing costs, annual maintenance fees which vary wildly depending on where you buy property, and annual points membership fees. Once you have an account, you pay a reservation fee each time you make a booking. The key to finding a good deal is to find a timeshare with the lowest constant costs: low annual maintenance fees and the highest corresponding value of points. The maintenance fees are the cost that varies considerably between locations. So do the point values.

However, we didn’t need a lot of points b/c of the tip that the salesman in Hawaii told us about. With RCI, within a 45 day window, “weeks” resorts will let remaining vacant units go for 9000 points or less. Some of those same units “cost” 60,000 points or more if you book more than 45 days in advance. During the 45 day window, many go for less than 9000 points. The least that we’ve seen is 6000 points. But we never plan our trips more than 45 days in advance. We don’t know what flights will look like that far in advance. So it suits us perfectly.

We bought our timeshare on ebay. We bought a place in Florida that very likely we will never visit. However, it had low annual maintenance fees and enough points for us to take at least 2 week long vacations with points each year. Being timeshare owners, we also found that we have access to their last-minute deals, called last call, which allow you to book units within the next two months without using any points at all. The costs for these units are very reasonable: $250 for a week in a 2 bedroom unit, $225 for a 1 bedroom and $200 for a studio. Usually resorts let places go for “last call” when it is off season or when they are new resort, or they are just not filling to capacity for whatever reason. We added my in-laws, who are retired, as owners on our points account so that they could access this benefit without using a guest certificate (which costs extra). They just got a place in Florida, last call, for this week. It was great. We went down for the weekend to stay with them. I just cannot believe what a great deal it is.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. It all sounds great, but what are the actual numbers? Show me the money, right? So, let’s compare apples to apples. The salesman in Hawaii wanted to sell us a place in Hawaii for $14,000. The associated point value was 60,000 per year. The annual maintenance fee was $850. Then there were closing costs of $2000 and the annual points membership fee of $125. Audible gulp, at least for us.

We bought, on ebay, a place in Florida for $350. The closing costs were $450. The annual maintenance fees are $285. Our annual points membership fees are the same, $125 per year (there are no deals on those unless you prepay for several years, which we actually did for $100 per year). The points value is 35,000, every other year, or 17,500 points each year. It gives us a little less than 2 weeks vacations each year at 9000 points each. We can choose to look for places that are less than 9000 points per week or we can “rent” points from RCI for the low price of 2 cents per point. So, if we needed to rent 500 points, it would cost $10. I think there may have been a minimum/maximum number of points that you can rent, but we haven’t had to do that yet. We’ve always found places for less than 9000 points if that’s what we needed to do. We also focus on the last call specials available if we don’t want to use points. We could also “borrow” points from ourselves, from future points years, if we didn’t want to “rent” extra points. We haven’t had to either so far. And, the best part, we can access all the same resorts that buying into that expensive Hawaii timeshare would've allowed us.

Our constant annual outlay, not including the initial costs of purchase, is only the maintenance fee and points membership fee. If we use points, we also pay a booking/reservation fee of $164 for the week. Our timeshare vacations this last year included a 1 bedroom unit in Kauai, a huge studio in the Bahamas, a 2 bedroom huge place on a lake in Big Sky, MT, and a gigantic 2 bedroom place on the water in Mazatlan, Mexico. Only Kauai and Big Sky required using points, the Bahamas and Mazatlan were “last call” specials. Our total annual cost for all these places was:

Points membership fee: $100
Reservation fees: $164, $200, $164, $225 (these vary based on resort but the most we’ve paid is $250 for a last call)
Points used: 18000 (only Kauai and Big Sky required using points)
Annual maintenance fee: $285

So our annual cost was approximately $1138.
The upfront purchase cost that we spent of $800 I think is fair to divide over, let’s say 10 years, so we can assume an annual cost of $80 for that.

To be fair, many of the resorts charge “hidden” fees, like a state/visitor tax (you’d pay this in a hotel, too), a cleaning fee, electricity or a/c fee, etc. However, they are all clearly indicated before you book the resort so you know what you will have to pay. Last year Kauai and the Bahamas had visitor taxes in the amount total of around $100. In the interest of full disclosure, sometimes resorts will charge extra for wifi access or extras like cribs or highchairs.

So our total annual cost, including divided upfront purchase and hidden fees, last year was $1318. For 4 weeks of vacations in what I consider luxurious condos, that comes out to $329 per week, or $47 per night. Not too shabby, huh? We couldn’t even get a dump in Lihue, Kauai for that price.

Vacationing with a child really makes this a bargain. Considering the alternative of sharing a hotel room or booking multiple rooms, the convenience of having a kitchen and many times multiple bathrooms (many of the 2 bedroom units have 2 bathrooms as well), staying in a condo is much more comfortable.

I’m not saying everyone should run out and buy a timeshare. I just wanted to share how we’ve found a way to go on vacation for a price that fits into our budget. I think we enjoy vacations even more knowing that we are doing them in a financially responsible way.